So this last few months I've been a bit of a recluse to everyone around me. I needed some time on my own to decide and come to terms with where my path was taking me. Tonight I've taken the largest leap I've ever taken spiritually. I announced to the Grove I've been a part of for almost a year now that I am officially leaving the Grove and will be starting my own Coven. The response was so much better than I could have wished or asked for. Not only am I retaining my initiation, but I recieved the blessing and support of the Grove and the High Priestess and High Priest. I feel somewhat like I did when I first left my parents place to move out on my own. Today is certainly one of the high points of my magickal path.

Just wanted to tell everyone thank you for your very kind and uplifting coments. I'm the kind of person that when I fall, I fall hard. (hint: read last blog) Therefore it's very hard for me to just let go especially when there is no real closure. Again, thank you very much for your kind thoughts.

Blessed be,

Myrrdin

I was sitting tonight with friends around a bonfire for the first of the season. It felt so good, untill the conversation between one particular friend and I got deep. He was there with me through the whole of my last trainwreck relationship. He just had to ask how she was, hard to say when I don't exist in her world.

I remember being the one, at one time. I remember being someone she wanted and smiled at when she saw me. When she needed me, I was there. When her cousin committed suicide, and she had to work three days later, I was there for her the entire night... just to make sure she made it through. She was... she was someone I thought I knew, and I was in love with the person she let me believe she was. Then one day I wasn't needed, she had her own place, and had her freedom. Suddenly, I was a "friend" that was no longer called, or texted, or even welcomed when I was around. She tought me a hard lesson... even I can be decieved.  I've always prided myself on being able to see things coming, she proved me not so good. I wish I could say I don't love her anymore, but I do and always will. That part sucks ass. Guess I wasn't good enough to keep when she didn't "need" me. The sad part is this happened almost a month ago, and I still don't go a day without thinking about her. I know that love will find me again, I know that I'll be a stronger person for what I've been through, but I love her. Am I stupid? I don't know... Guess in the very least I'm a fool. Seriously I should have known better than to be the "rebound" guy and believe her. Still... it's hard to understand how someone can do that to someone else.

Blessed be,

Myrrdin

Ok, I just have to tell everyone cause I'm still pinching myself. So I have this friend at work, and his in laws just bought a car lot near where I live. I told them before I knew this that I was looking for a new car because my old POS wasn't going to survive the commute much longer. Thats when they told me about there in laws and said I should go talk to them. So yesterday after work I did, and started the loan process, to my amazement I was approved, and today am the proud new owner of a 2000 Ford ZX2. Sorry, this is the first "real" car loan I've ever been approved for (financing $4500), so to me this is like a major milestone }:-D

Blessed be to all,

Myrrdin